Breakup Therapy: Expert Level
He never knew or realized that him being there, him pretending that he cared for me, him using me and keeping me on his line…all it did was stop me from needing the release from being alone. From being lonely enough that action had to be taken.
This is what I found out only after he left me. After he quit answering when I texted or called. When he finally really let me go. I learned that I needed to do certain things to make me happy. Things he could never have helped me with.
Things like slowly, very slowly, cutting into someone’s skin. Watching the blood trickle slowly at first and then in a steady stream down their bodies. All while they tried to scream or cry out through the gag and tape covering their mouth.
It’s their own fault really. They are the ones that lied on their dating profile. The ones who lied to me and made me feel stupid for believing them. Now I have a way to be happy, while I’m searching for the one that was meant for me.
Let me start way back. My first boyfriend. I was only 13 when I met him but from that moment I was hooked.
We did everything together. School, after school, weekends. Everything. We were together for a very long time, I was 21 when we split. I was ready to be single yet I wasn’t and didn’t really care for it.
For a few years, I had my wild days. You know what those are, no explanation needed. Lol. Then I got pregnant, yep, whoops!
But I would never have given up the experience of my child! I spent many years just working and raising him. I got lonely at times, but my child was always there so I stayed busy.
As my son grew up and became more independent I thought I would try dating again. Yea, wish I could just skip all the BS of dating and just find the right guy.
It’s what I found out there that made me bitter and angry towards people. Guys in particular who say they are looking for “the one.” Every single one lied about more than one thing which I eventually found out about as we talked or after we met in person once or twice…or even years into knowing them.
I thought I had found the one. He was great! Of course, I didn’t really care much for him the first time we met. I actually told my best friend that I was never going to see him again after that first meet.
HA!!! Over the next almost 8 years we had gotten close, fought, “broke up” (hard to do when not actually dating) got “back together“ (yet not actually dating) had good times where we laughed and had fun. But also a lot of not so fun times where I told him to leave and I was going to bed. A very Rocky road of “friendship” if I do say so myself.
What pulled the lynchpin out of this long term “relationship” was me complaining about him not answering texts for days and days. Right after that, he was gone. No answer to texts/calls/nothing. He didn’t say goodbye, he was just gone.
I was, of course, hurt at first, then happy that I was free from it. There was so much stuff from over the years I didn’t have to deal with anymore.
Like him canceling plans with me after the time we were supposed to meet up. Taking stuff out on me that his ex did.
Not answering texts or calls. Going out with other women while telling me for years he wasn’t going out with women at all. Lying about his last name which I found out about 4 years into our “friendship.”
He did something I wasn’t able to do on my own, leave and just be done!! Now it was done!
After just a couple weeks though I started feeling lonely, unwanted and restless. I joined a dating site to try to meet the guy for me but I kept running across the same problem. Every guy lied on their profile that I talked to.
They say they live in one city, but they don’t. They say they have a car, but don’t mention they don’t have a valid driver’s license. They lie about their names, on and on.
One day I was bored, lonely, and heavy in the heart when I got a message. They wanted me to come over and watch a movie and talk, maybe a little kissing and cuddling too, they add at the bottom of their message.
What the heck, right? I’m bored so I get their address and head on over. Not the smartest thing, but whatever. Who cares right now anyway?
I get there and he opens the door, only it’s a much older version of himself than in his profile pics. Maybe 10 years older even…enough that I almost just turned around and left. But I had driven 40 minutes to get here so I didn’t.
I could feel the irritation bubbling within me because of his lie.
I walked in and he immediately started in with all the typical lines about how beautiful I am, how he’s so attracted to me. All of that nonsense all guys say when they want some no matter what you look like.
A few hours later, I’m laying in his bed, he’s passed out next to me and I start thinking about guys like this. Guys that will most likely either never message me again or only message me to come over and do this again. But never to actually go out on a date.
Why would he? I already gave in to what he really wanted. I stewed until I worked myself up to do something about it. I didn’t want to give him the chance to push me aside or do this to anyone else.
I get up and go into the bathroom. I look around but don’t see anything I could use. I go to the kitchen and find the sharpest knife I could find.
As I’m walking through the house I keep an eye out for things I can use. Things to tie him up with, to gag him, anything to help me teach him that lying is wrong and using people is wrong!
He starts to wake as I finish tying his arms and legs up to his bed. I quickly place the gag in his mouth and use the duct tape I found to cover his mouth and hold the gag in.
Now that I was this far, my mind was spinning. What did I want to do first? What would be the right punishment for his wrongdoings?
So many possibilities, so little time. He’s staring at me with confusion and a lot of fear in his eyes. I’m really liking that fear I see.
I start to carve little designs into his belly, not anything specific, just little swirly gigs. His blood starts to come out and slowly roll down his sides and plop…landing on the sheets I had just been laying on earlier with him. Spectacular!!!
I carve more, some really deep where the blood flows free, helping to color and give shade to the design, and some shallow where the blood barely comes to the surface.
I quickly run out of room on his belly and move up to his chest. I tried making little flower designs, but there was just too much hair getting in the way so I had to shave the area first.
I walked back to the bathroom, grabbed the shaving kit off the counter. As I was walking back to the bedroom, imagining what I was going to do next, I did a quick detour to the kitchen.
Did he have a mandolin slicer? I remember once a friend cutting their finger on one. What fun that would be to use!!! I look around but unfortunately couldn’t find one so I’ll just have to improvise.
I shave his chest and start gouging out spots to make the design of a flower. I love flowers! They can be so beautiful.
I cut semi-thick and really thin slices of different lengths off his arm and set them up in the grooves I gouged out of his chest, making sure that the skin side is facing down so the nice pink and red are showing. It looked so good I wanted to take a picture just to remember it but decided I didn’t want that evidence on my phone.
I played a while longer, making my designs, coloring it with the red and then the black/brown of the blood as it dried. When the blood stopped flowing I looked at the guy and realized he had died. What a pity! I was having fun!
I washed up a bit in the sink in the kitchen. Washing my hands, arms, and face. Everywhere I could see blood at a glance. I made sure I had all my stuff, phone, clothes, etc and left.
I wasn’t all covered in blood as I left, but I did have some on me. I felt a bit sick to my stomach now as I drove home. Not because of what I had just done, I smiled to myself thinking of that, but because I really liked this shirt.
It was one of my favorites and now it would have to be burned.
When I got home I went to the dating app and blocked the guy I just sliced and diced. Doing this deleted all the messages we had sent back forth, making it look like we had never messaged, to begin with.
Then I took care of the business of destroying the clothes I had been wearing, took a shower and went to bed. It was the best night’s sleep I had gotten in years.
The next day I was still all giddy and happy. I was in the best mood I had really ever been in. I knew within a few days or so I would be back to being lonely and would need something again, but for now…
I looked at my phone as it dinged with a new message from the dating app. As I opened it I recognized the guy as someone I had talked to before. A guy who lied to me about sooo much stuff as well as telling me to treat him like I would a cheater because he would cheat on me.
As I looked at his picture I could already feel the anger bubbling up.
I wiped the blood off his face, so I could get one good last look at him. Lying there with the glazed over dead stare. It was so beautiful!!
All I could think was to say thank you to the guy who finally freed me completely after almost 8 years of trying to be with someone I loved who would never love me back. Freed me so I could find my happiness.